PASSIA SEMINARS 2003

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Training Program on

Communication Skills


Lecture Program   Course Outline  


From the Lecture Program:
 
DAY ONE: THURSDAY. 11 SEPTEMBER 2003
Perception and Communication-The Psychological ViewPoint
by Dr. Khaleel Isa

I): Getting in Touch with your Communication and Perception Skills

Exercise:
Observe the person on your right and left for one minute. Directly afterwards, on a piece of paper, describe both of them separately, using adjectives to describe their characteristics you observed.

a) Tell both individuals your perception of them
b) Check in with the accuracy of your assumptions
c) Discuss the importance of the activity with the class

 

 

 

  1. We take data we pick up from others, and after a process of filtering , sifting and refining, we respond to the particular personal understanding of the situation.

  2. This often =a distortion of our own creation.

  3. We observe dress, tone, eye movement, our voice, age, sex, attire, attractiveness, gestures, posture , focus of power, & flow of language .

  4. What we observe = SELECTIVE PERCEPTION

  5. Think about how all these Characteristics can affect your opinion and thus influence your Thoughts of that particular person.

  6. Exercise: Trainer draws a Triangle, with many different angles. He/She asks the participants how many Triangles do they see?

  7. Point of Exercise: To prove that we all have our own perception of the exact same thing.

II) Where does Perception come from?

  1. Perception can come from how we grew up, and the likes and dislikes that we experience within our lives.
  2. Once we decide upon our views of life, people are influenced by their life positions, in how they think, feel, act, perceive, communicate and relate to others.
  3. Perceptions and Cognitions develop in sequential stages throughout Childhood and Adolescence to Adulthood

    Excercise:

    Remember and Write down times when you were sad, angry, happy, lonely, and stressed and going to work. Think of when you met some person at work for the first time who you will be working closely with. What was your impression/ Perception of them?

    Does your Mood influence the type of Invisible Lenses you have when making Judgements?

    Did your stereotypes affect the communication between you and your collegue?

    List some of the first impression characteristics that describe that person. Does that Impression still affect your perception and opinion of them? Has it Changed since knowing them?

    Next time you notice your moods, Write down your Perceptions, Reactions & Thoughts of that person you are working with, and see whether it is Distorted because of your current mood or not!

III) Reflection of first impression:

  1. What was their perception of you?
  2. How accurate was their first impression?
  3. Did it affect our attitude and communication with that person?
  4. How inflexible did become as a result of this first rigid impression of you?
  5. It is important to look at our initial perception which thus affects our behavior, thoughts, and style of communication.


IV) How False Assumptions and Perceptions through Feelings can be Changed with a Third Eye:

Exercise: Write down four feelings you know you experience more frequently than other feelings when at work.
I.E.

1. Anger
2. Jealousy
3. Frustrated
4. Overwhelmed
5. Resentful
6. Happy


How do you express these feeling?
What is your body language communicating?
What is your facial expressions communicating?
How is your non verbal communication being perceived?
How do others respond to your body language?

    1. By understanding what and how your body language and facial expressions communicate, you are more able to understand & empathize with your colleagues non verbal language skills
    2. This creates can a non-defensive environment and more productive working relationship.

Johari Window Exercise:

This is an insightful psychological exercise which opens up the Third Eye and makes people more aware of their invisible traits.

Conscious Side Unconscious Side
Box 1: Known to Self & Others Box 3: The Blind Self
Box 2: Hidden Self Box 4: The Emotional Self

Box 1: The Known Self: It is the part of you which you purposely show everyone and they see you how you want to be seen

Box 2: The Blind Self: It is the part of you, that only others see but and you have no idea about it when people tell you.

Box 3: The Hidden Self: It is the part of you that only you know and do not show others.

Box 4: The emotional Self: It is the part of you that motivates you to be you. It is your pathogenic belief system. It is your past emotional experiences from your life.

Write down this box and see if this is gives you insight into your self and influences your style of communication and perception of self and others.


V) Understanding How to be a better Listener & Communications:

Ask yourself:

  1. How many times has tension and Defensiveness arose in your communication with colleagues?
  2. How?, Why? & What Happened?
  3. How do you remember your behavior when upset and tense?
  4. How does status of power play into communicating your thoughts?

Key successes of Communication: Talker & Listener

  1. Listening attentively-When listening to someone, put away your agenda
  2. Repeat exactly what the other person is saying- Do not put your own interpretation into what they are saying. This only creates more problems
  3. Check in with the person about if they felt heard, understood or if you should listen better.
  4. Be aware of your non verbal body language
  5. Be patient with the person talking, you will get your chance to talk
  6. Empathy- without empathy you will never see how they are feeling and it will be one-sided always. There is two sides to all stories and opinions
  7. Understand what makes you Defensive- use the Johari Window exercise to look deep inside self about your Triggers of defensiveness
  8. Once Talker finishes and feels the other person heard them correctly, switch positions, from listener becoming the talker and talker becoming the listener.

Exercise:

Get into three groups, and have one facilitator, one talker, & one listener.

  1. Let the Talker have something that is currently bothering he/she and discuss it to the listener.
  2. The listener's job is to repeat back what is said
  3. The facilitator's job is to be the mediator
  4. Switch roles with each other
  5. Be aware of how each role was similar, different and how it felt to be the facilitator, listener & talker
  6. Talk about it amongst the trainer for improvement, ideas, and evaluation

VI) Goals: Develop exercises in your Work that-

    1. Stimulate participants to listen more carefully
    2. To develop skills in the feedback of verbal content
    3. To help people have clear and succinct expression of ideas
    4. To increase one's awareness of non-verbal cues in the communication process
    5. To observe how different people give exact defections in different ways
    6. To observe different individuals ways to receive directions
    7. To gain a better understanding of what happens when Stress + Communication occurs

By establishing these goals: This will improve-

  1. The development of interpersonal communication within the working environment
  2. To establish an openness within the working environment in which content and feelings help increase the production of the work
  3. To help explore perceptions of one another as a way to have more succinct goals and objectives for an appropriate working environment

 

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